A page from my diary

5th November 2002

The number of mice I have eaten today, 5 (hurray!)
The number of cats which I have driven away today, 3 (very good!)
The number of ornaments which I have broken today, 2 (not so good…)

Dear diary, I was dreaming a wonderful dream about hundreds of thousands of mice raining from the sky. I was lying on the ground with my mouth wide open and swallowed them one after another. Then suddenly a human’s hand lifted me up from my warm and cosy bed filled with goose down. It was my mistress Linda. She took a comb made of steal from a blue cupboard which contained other unpleasant things such as brushes and cat shampoos.

She began to comb me all over. When she tried to comb out all the tangles in my fur, it hurt. Mjjaauw! This made me think about that time when she bathed me. After an hour of fighting she finally let me loose from her leg. I looked like a wet, pitiful, small rat and for three days I was bullied by all the cats in the neighbourhood. Especially the self-righteous Beryl, a fat cat with black and white markings which is bad-tempered and vicious.

When Linda put me in a cage made of steel, I realized what was going to happen. She was going to take me for a horrible journey to the vet. It was a long way there and terrible, too. The cage was shaking so much that I threw up in a curve.

When we finally arrived, we had to sit and wait for an hour. There was a feeling of depression in the waiting room. A golden retriever and its master were sitting next to us. He told me that he had broken his leg. The accident had occurred when he was climbing a tree and fell down. He asked me how I felt. I answered that I was feeling excellent and I didn’t know why Linda had taken me here to this place.

Suddenly the door opened and the vet came out. He was a man in his middle-age, he was clean-shaven with greying hair and a receding hairline. I put out my paw nicely and he took hold of it and we shook hands. Linda put me down on a bench. The vet turned on a sharp and dazzling light and now the surprise was revealed. I saw a pointed needle in front of me. “A vaccination syringe! Mjauu!” When the vet pushed it into my skin I scratched him. I got scolded by Linda.

I was so angry with Linda that I didn’t say a word to her all the way home. At home she boiled codfish for me. It tasted delicious so I must say that I have revised my opinion about her. She also took 24 photos of me today, she never gives up. She says that she wants to have a good photo of me which she can hang on the wall. I don’t see any difference between all those hundreds of photos she has already taken of me. Why not choose one of them?

By the way, isn’t it the Animals’ Day today? If not, it should be.

Now I’m so tired that I can hardly press any of the buttons on my computer. I’m going to return to my cosy bed and I hope that I can dream about my wonderful mice without any one disturbing me.

Skriven av: Linda-Miranda Garbén